Things I have Learned In A College Town (and more)
Over eight years ago, I took a half day of high school to take my first trip up to Ithaca. A normal trip from Boston to Ithaca usually takes me anywhere between 6-7 hours, depending on traffic or other occurrences. My first trip was an estimated 9-10 hours. Those of you who know my track record of car stories will appreciate this one.
The day I drove up with my father happened to be the day a huge winter storm was supposed to hit. When I left school that day the weather was still normal, so my father decided the best thing was to have me drive for the first 3 hours and then he would take over the last three—-thinking by then the weather might get worse. Wrong. Of course the weather decided to blow up right smack in the middle of my drive on the Mass Pike. As a fairly new driver, and one of the first times driving on that deadly thing I like to call a “weather divide”, my anxiety fled through the roof. I drove a DaeWoo. Not exactly a prime car for a blizzard. I’m almost positive that they don’t even make cars anymore, but they do make televisions. Good thing they decided to switch industries because my poor little white DaeWoo couldn’t stand a chance against Mother Nature.
My seventeen year old self was positive that my car, my father, and I would somehow end up in a ditch and no one would ever find us because we would blend in with the snow. There’s a saying that you should be careful for what you wish for because you just might get it. However, in my case freaking about ending up in a ditch actually led me into a ditch. While trying to pass a truck that seemed like a mile long and in the midst of trying to fight off my father’s screaming about my driving—-my car did a 360 and yup, ended in a ditch. By some miracle (again), no one was hurt. The only problem we had was poor cell phone reception on my Zach Morris Nokia and a car that could barely stand a chance of making it out. Luckily a state trooper who happened to pass 20 minutes later, stopped to make sure we got taken care of. An hour later, we were pulled out of the ditch, and I was no longer to drive en route to Ithaca (or back, for that matter). But what turned out to be an almost disastrous trip ended up being one of the most memorable weekends that ultimately led to my decision to pick Ithaca out of the other college acceptances.
When I was faced with the reality to move back to the East coast, I never once considered moving back to Boston as an option. Although I knew it could of been one. I couldn’t face the thought of being on the same coast, but away from the place *I* had made home. We are all born in the place we call home. To me, Boston is and always will be my first home. There’s always going to be that nostalgic feeling whenever I am reminded or near or in the city. But when it comes to Ithaca, it is a place that I made home from the friends that have turned into family. When I had no choice to leave a new love behind (San Francisco), I was torn. I felt like someone had completely ripped me to shreds and left me high and dry. But now, months after transitioning back to this coast I have truly looked at this as a blessing in disguise. The beauty of life is sometimes when you least expect it you end up back in the place you were trying to escape to learn that there’s a reason why.
And after years of living in Ithaca, I have made some incredible discoveries about living in this particular college-town. There are things that make Ithaca what it is.
1. Reality vs. College. College is a safe bubble. Period. If you had asked me 8 years ago If I had imagined myself still living here after graduating, I probably would’ve laughed in your face. At age 18, my heart was one hundred percent committed to the city of Boston. I avoided Yankee fans like the plague. I got into fights at parties with people who were “too New York”. I got kicked out of the IC football house because I rubbed in the fact that there was no one better (and sexier) than Tom Brady. When the Red Sox won the world series my first year of college, the girls on my floor had no idea why I was literally crying tears of joy. Whereas I still til this day love Boston, this mentality had me set that I would move home after graduating. While I truly did love school, it took me several years to adjust and actually appreciate the town of Ithaca. The reality of what the town was when I wasn’t in school really opened my eyes. Whether you admit it or not, being a college kid is like being in the real world but only skimming the surface while wearing layers of bubble wrap. My best discoveries of Ithaca as well as meeting some of the most incredible people (I hate to say this, but yes even Yankee fans) did not happen until after I graduated and left campus.
2. Alcohol. It’s everywhere. Period. But I have a theory that the town of Ithaca can outdrink anyone else. I’ve lived in the city where Irish pubs and drinking were a way of life. I’ve lived abroad where absinthe was legal and wine was cheaper than bread. I’ve lived an hour away from a little piece of heaven, California wine country. But I still believe that Ithaca wins. We all know Ithaca is gorges. Ithaca is cold. And please no, it is not “gangstah”. BUT WHY has NO ONE ever made a shirt or a bumper sticker that says “Ithaca is drunk”. When I was living in San Francisco, my alcohol tolerance dropped 10 folds. I was tipsy after two glasses of wine. Here, if I was tipsy after two glasses of wine (it has happened), I would be handed a bottle of Jameson. Don’t mind if I do.
When Charles Dickens said “it was the best of times and it was the worst of times”, I’m pretty sure he was referring to alcohol. Alcohol in this town can get you in more trouble than you’d ever imagine or it can—and sometimes simultaneously—create some of the best memories and nights. Ever. And I’m not just talking college here.
Alcohol in Ithaca flows faster than the water at the gorges. Somehow, I’m 25 and alive. Kicking still well.
Thanks for the memories (or sometimes not any), Alcohol.
3. One-Way streets. Ithaca would not be Ithaca without confusing the fuck out of you. My parents had to drop me off at school a week before everyone else was arriving on campus. The campus was empty. Naturally, I started to panic. While cursing the hills of Ithaca, I decided I would take a drive in my new car, my Mishubishi Outlander (R.I.P Baby). After trekking to the middle of never-never land that I called the freshmen parking lot, I decide to cruise around downtown. Those of you who know me like to joke around about my driving skills. Well, I just so happen to think that I’m a perfectly fine driver. I swear New York brought out the bad driver inside of me. And it all began with the one-way streets of Ithaca. Imagine driving with the Ithaca library on your left and you are heading towards the Holiday Inn. Anyone in Ithaca knows this is immediately wrong. The library would never be on your left and you can never head towards the Holiday Inn in that direction. Unless of course, you are Steph Cafano. To make it even worse, once I started realizing I was on a one-way, I turned onto North Cayuga (another one-way). Years later, I feel like I have excelled at my one-way driving but I have never gotten over the fact how pissed off these streets make me. When I am hungover and need my freaking iced-coffee from Dunkin Donuts, I do not want to circle around the block just to get there because I, simply, have to.If it wasn’t for the damn one-way streets, I could’ve already purchased and drank my entire coffee by now.
Alas, When I witness other’s “one-way” mishaps , I am guilty of laughing. That is unless it causes an accident or traffic. Accidents suck. Traffic isn’t cool.
4. Relationships. Hook-ups. Friends. Exes. None of the above. All of the above. It is safe to say that I have acquired all of this and more during my years of living in Ithaca. Because of Mark Zuckerberg, Steve Jobs, and other technology or social-media related portals, the essence of creating bonds with other people have plummeted. No one knows what anything means anymore.You can be facebook friends with someone, sleep together and get ignored when out in public. You can know someone for several years, but still have no idea what they are thinking. Ithaca has subdivisions of relationships. It’s bad enough that Ithaca is small enough that you may end up hooking up within the same group of people. Well if that isn’t awkward at it’s finest, than I don’t know what is. At first I used to think that I was the queen of drawing the lucky assholes in Ithaca, but now I know it isn’t just me. Because whether you are single, in a relationship, or in some sort of “it’s complicated” status, it has nothing to do with being “unlucky”. Technology has created a huge barricade between people. As much as I love my iphone. I hate it. I can’t even count the number of times my friends—-women AND men—-have seriously blanked on decoding a text message or status update as if it were the freaking Davinci Code. Honestly, it’s bullshit. Technology shouldn’t destroy building an actual relationship(whatever that “type” of relationship is), nor should it be a cop out to expressing or speaking with someone—whether you like them OR not. Don’t beat around the bush. I don’t know if it’s the scene in Ithaca or what that drives people to be this way, but this whole topic drives me crazy. Whereas there are assholes in every city or location, I honestly believe that men (and sometimes girls too) here are not generally assholes. What DOES make them APPEAR to be assholes is their serious lack of basic social skills without the help of liquid courage. The longer I’ve lived in Ithaca the harder it has become to just have fun with someone and not worry about titles. I miss the old days where it didn’t matter what you were with someone, but if you enjoyed hanging out or even just hooking up, it was good enough. No over-analyzing.No facebook creeping. No wondering if that person was going to call or not. Just enjoying someone for whatever the purpose was.
I think the worst part of this is that I am completely guilty of several things when it comes to it. Whether I’ve tried to hide it, deny it or whatever. There’s nothing like the excuse “well I drunk texted him so it means nothing”. I am guilty of being socially awkward. I am guilty of the drunk calls. I am guilty of over-analyzing, not analyzing, and not caring. I am guilty of caring “too much”. I am guilty of playing the game, not playing the game, having no idea what the game is and having an ego. I have also been shot done, dragged through the ringer, and felt more used and abused by guys I’ve met in Ithaca than anywhere else. Most of us have been down one of these roads before. To the people of Ithaca, RESPECT is seven letter word that can make all of us feel a HELL of a lot better about ourselves. USE IT AND LOVE IT.
5. Infamous characters of Ithaca. We all know them. Josiah. Starlight. Magic Guy. Flashlight/Biker Mark. Hot Dog Guy. The guy in the blue shorts who runs to Wegmans everyday with a backpack. Even the statue lady in the commons. I’ve seen my fair share of people in the world. I’ve been fortunate to travel to several places in my lifetime, but there’s something about Ithaca. Just when you think you’ve seen it all, there’s ALWAYS something else out there. Amusement doesn’t always have to happen in big cities. Sometimes, it’s your neighbor with a scary looking life-size shiny gold Oscar-award looking statue on their porch. And you know what they say, if you don’t think anyone else is weird or a little out there, chances are it’s probably you. :)
And I mean that with all my love.
and now…a trip down memory lane…..
